B.H. 2nd of Tammuz Brooklyn, N.Y.

Blessing and Greeting:

I duly received your letter, in which you write about your acquaintance with, and unofficial engagement to, a young man from America, but that recently some friction has developed, and you are worried by the fact that he does not speak about setting a date for the wedding, which you suspect might have to do with the said friction. You therefore ask my advice.

My impression from your writing is that insofar as Hashkofo and Yahadus are concerned you are both in agreement, as also other major considerations. Consequently, though you write that he has a temper etc., it is my opinion that the Shidduch should be continued and brought to conclusion, with an early wedding in a happy and auspicious hour.

I trust you will not take amiss my following remarks. It is not unusual that the kind of frictions which you describe should occur in a situation where the actual wedding is unduly delayed after a decision has been reached on a Shidduch. For such a delay often leads to undesirable situations according to the Shulchan Aruch. In other words, inappropriate familiarity and closeness results in inappropriate estrangement, or the kind of friction you mention.

In the light of the above, if you decide to continue with the Shidduch, this decision should be coupled with a resolve to do all that is up to you - in a suitable manner of course - to have the wedding at the earliest possible date.

With blessing,

M. Schneerson