By the Grace of G-d3rd of Tammuz, 5734Brooklyn, N.Y.

Greeting and Blessing:

I have just received your letter in which you write about your niece, a “returnee.”

First of all, let me make it clear that I do not give orders, G-d forbid, to anyone. When a person asks my advice, I give it to the best of my knowledge in the best interest of the person as I see it.

Next, it is not my custom to offer any suggestions to anyone on the basis of information received through a second party. This is not because of questioning the information — far be it from me, but because the person directly concerned is the best qualified to speak for himself and herself.

Thirdly and this is the most essential point: One must be very cautious in a situation which involves a person’s religious beliefs and principles, especially when it concerns a young person in the formative years. This is particularly true in the present day and age of spiritual and moral confusion, when a very large number of our people are groping in the dark, in all directions, seeking meaning and content in life. You are surely aware of all this, especially in this country.

In light of the above, it should be a cause of great satisfaction, to say the least, to see a young person that has found a firm anchorage in deep religious convictions, to the extent of willingly forgoing amenities and comfort in the daily life. Surely, such a person, especially a near and dear one, should be encouraged and helped and not, G-d forbid, discouraged and making things more difficult in any way.

On the basis of what has been said, it should be self-evident that I cannot advise anyone to place oneself in a situation where one would face daily frictions or have to compromise deep-felt principles, especially one’s religious convictions. Moreover, experience has shown and I have seen it, that such frictions are not conducive to adjustment and acceptance, but on the contrary.

Hence I cannot advise your niece to go to Florida, as you suggest, for it is a matter for her to decide whether it would involve her in friction and compromise or not.

Inasmuch as I do not know you personally, my following remarks are offered with circumspection. I trust you will do your utmost to impress upon your sister, the mother of your niece, if she is not already fully aware of it, that the young generation in this country are living in a crisis of spiritual confusion; that young people are generally not inclined to make compromises in matters of principle and that if they are coerced into compromising a cherished principle, the consequences cannot be foreseen. Your sister should therefore be most happy to see her daughter so tenacious in her newly found way of life, especially as this is the way of life that has sustained and preserved our people in its 35 centuries of existence.

With esteem and blessing,

P.S. I should have taken a stance in connection with some expressions in your letter such as “Her G-d” (in reference to your sister, “orthodox religion” and the like). I will let it go, however, since you mention that Rabbi . . . is your mechutan, though this makes it all the more strange to see such expressions in your letter.